'Beloved sweetheart bastard. Not a day since then
I haven't wished him dead, Prayed for it
so hard I've dark green pebbles for eyes,
ropes on the back of my hands I could strangle with. (Is this line referring to Molly?)
Spinster. I stink and remember. Whole days
in bed cawing Nooooo at the wall; the dress
yellowing, trembling if I open the wardrobe;
the slewed mirror, full-length, her, myself, who did this to me?
Puce curses that are sounds not words.
Some nights better, the lost body over me,
my fluent tongue in its mouth in its ear
then down till I suddenly bite awake.
Love's hate behind a white veil; a red balloon bursting
in my face. Bang. I stabbed at a wedding-cake.
Give me a male corpse for a long slow honeymoon.
Don't think it's only the heart that b-b-b-breaks.'
After reading this poem i feel you get more of an understanding of Miss Havishams thoughts and emotions. Sometimes throughout it's in a very obvious way, when she says, 'Not a day since i haven't wished him dead.' You know exactly who and what she is talking about. Other lines in the poem I feel are more vague about the meaning. They are very aggressive though, so you really get a sense of the anger and hatred Miss Havsiham had built up in her, as she uses very violent words throughout like, 'bang, stabbed, strangle.' And it certainly portrays Miss Havishams want for revenge with lines like 'Give me a male corpse for a long slow honeymoon.'
Some of the sections i have put in bold are aspects which would definitely contribute to her appearance. 'I stink and remember.' If she smells, this means she wasn't washing and this would effect her appearance. She would have a dirty sweaty face as I have talked about in other posts whilst researching Victorain health and hygiene. 'The dress yellowing' is another line which reinstates to me how she wouldn't have been keeping up with her hygiene.
The line 'the lost body over me' I feel could be interpreted as Miss Havisham talking about herself. Which really makes me think about how Miss Havisham has not taken care of her body or health as she could be referring to her own body as 'lost'. Not just about maintaining her appearance, but in other ways such as eating correctly, hygiene and sleeping. Which are things that would add to her appearance, for example, bags under the eyes from lack of sleep and a very gaunt skeleton like face from bad diet.
http://www.pinterest.com/pin/481322278897358853/ |
After finding this poem I decided to look at other poets, this time from the Victorian era for further inspiration and character development. I found this poem by Elizabeth Browning who was a poet from about 1806-1861.
Poem found:
After looking at these poems, i began thinking about where else i see Miss Havisham and what other things i think could relate to her. I started to think about music and started listening to songs i listen to on my playlist everyday differently, realising a lot of songs are written about heartbreak and lost love, the same feelings Miss Havisham had. A particular song that stood out for me in regards to relate ability to Miss Havisham was Adele, Rolling in the deep. The song talks about a heartbreak but you also feel the anger and hate and even want for revenge throughout which is exactly how Miss Havisham felt. Lyrics like, 'Theres a fire, starting in my heart' 'See how i leave with every piece of you, dont underestimate the things that i would do' 'The scars of your love, remind me of us (they leave me breathless), the keep me thinking that we almost had it all' 'i'm gonna make you head burn, think of me in depths of your despair' 'you had my heart inside of you hand, but you played it to the beat'
'My Heavy Heart.
I lift my heavy heart up solemnly,
As once Electra her sepulchral urn,
And, looking in thine eyes, I over-turn
The ashes at thy feet. Behold and see
What a great heap of grief lay hid in me,
And how the red wild sparkles dimly burn
Through the ashen greyness. If thy foot in scorn
Could tread them out to darkness utterly,
It might be well perhaps. But if instead
Thou wait beside me for the wind to blow
The grey dust up, . . . those laurels on thine head,
O my Beloved, will not shield thee so,
That none of all the fires shall scorch and shred
The hair beneath. Stand further off then! go!'
Although this poem is not directly connected to Miss Havisham like Caroline Duffy's, i feel this poem could be interrupted in many different ways. Some of these interruptions, could have elements and connections with Miss Havisham. The overall impression of the poem really gives a sense of misery and depression, something Miss Havsiham was brimming with. For example, 'could tread them out to darkness utterly' gives a real feel of the gloom and despair which could relate to Miss Havisham or even London itself in that time. This particularly reminds me of the opening scenes in the film renditions of Great expectations, with darkness and moodiness of the scenery, especially as the poem mentions 'greyness & grey' a lot throughout i cant help but think of a foggy smoggy London.
Although i think this poem could be about someone dying, i think it could also be implying that a part of her has died. Perhaps this is to do with a loss. A death or maybe a love leaving and abandoning her? Like Miss Havsiham. The line, 'What a great heap of grief lay hid in me,' really relates to Miss Havisham as she is experienced intense sorrow although not caused by a death it has left just as big of a scar.
After looking at both poems they have given me more of an understanding of how Miss Havisham was. Her general emotions and mood, which would play a large factor in her appearance and the Era itself.
Poem found:
Richard. (). Elizabeth Barret Browning. Available: http://www.poetseers.org/the-great-poets/female-poets/elizabeth-browning-poetry/my-heavy-heart/. Last accessed 13/02/2014.